Day 1 was…not a very enjoyable day. For anyone who has flown recently, I don’t need to tell you how hellish an experience it is right now. It used to be that if your flight was delayed or you got a hard time at the check-in counter or any other little inconvenience, you complained long and hard but things have gotten so bad these days that now it’s just the norm. It happens way more often than it doesn’t happen and so we all need to adjust our mindset I guess.
Regardless, I’m about to complain so deal with it.
In these days of COVID, it is more difficult to fly than ever because you must do extensive research on entry requirements to whichever country you are flying to. This is made even more difficult by the fact that you are basically trying to decipher ‘legalese’ which isn’t always easy. And so, I dutifully studied the rules and regulations of the Philippines’ entry requirements so we would not be caught off guard and to ensure we have everything in order. When it comes to such matters, I tend to be very thorough because, well, you have to be these days. Virginia, Xavier and I are fully vaccinated with booster so I figured that shouldn’t be an issue. Luca and Max are fully vaccinated but have not gotten a booster as they have not started giving them to kids yet at our base. The regulations on the official Philippines website are written rather ambiguously so at first I thought Luca needed a negative PCR test but upon reading the fine print, I realized I was mistaken. The Philippines considers you fully vaccinated if you have had either two shots of a two shot series or one of a one shot series, you do not need a booster. Age 12-17 just need to be fully vaccinated, younger than 12 do not. So bottom line is that all of us are considered fully vaccinated and do not need a negative PCR test or anything else to fly to the Philippines (remember this, it will come into play later). Of course, this being the Philippines, it could not be that easy; they set up a website called “One Health” where you have to go and register every person in the family, personal info, vaccine info and dates, passport numbers, etc. and then you have to upload a copy of your vaccination certificate. They then verify all your info and email you a copy of a bar code or QR code that you show upon arrival. I got everybody in the family registered and vaccine cards uploaded and got the confirmation emails back pretty quick so I figured we were good to go. I should have known better.
The word around these parts lately is that the Frankfurt Airport is a mess, people are missing flights, losing their luggage, some people say their luggage was never even scanned. It was recommended to get to the airport at least 4 hours before our flight and we did so, thankfully. We were so early that the check in desks were not even open yet and there were only a few people waiting so we took our place behind them. While we were waiting, I discovered that the scales at the check in counters were working so I was able to weigh each of our bags and find that all of them were below the maximum 23 kg which was a HUGE relief. Things were looking up when, about an hour later, the check in personnel arrived and the first thing the bastards did was rearrange the barriers for some inexplicable reason which meant that suddenly everyone behind is in line was now in front of us…and we had been THIRD in line. There was an Indian family who were way behind us but who instantly became first in line with the new configuration, and we figured they would just let those of us who got screwed go ahead of them since we were there before them but noooooo…these inconsiderate jerks just smiled and waltzed up to the counter like they’d just won the lottery while we stared at them in disgust. Tempers were starting to run high but the worst was still yet to come, at least for us. We eventually forced our way in front of a forgiving German gentleman who said “Ja, you were here before me, it’s ok” (Germans > Indians). We then proceeded to let the Arabs who were there when we arrived go before us while people behind us grumbled about losing their newfound - and ill gotten, I might add - favorable queue position.
We finally got up to the counter and I breathed a sigh of relief, thinking things were starting to come together. But it was not to be. The German lady checked passports with no problem, then asked to see our vaccination cards so I gave them to her and she studied them for a few minutes, then put Luca and Max’s cards down in front of me and said “So these two have a negative PCR test, right?”. My jaw dropped. I researched every little thing on that website, including the fine print and I KNEW she was wrong and I told her so, very nicely. What happened next was mind-numbingly painful. She called the supervisor over and the two of them started poring over some kind of binder that presumably contained entry regulations for various countries but it seemed to be confusing them even more. Eventually she came back to her seat at the desk and I tried in vain to explain that we already have approval to enter the Philippines via the Health One emails but she was completely ignoring me. I then pulled up the website on my phone and highlighted the part that said specifically that minors who are fully vaccinated do NOT need a negative PCR test but again…completely ignored. About 20 minutes later after much consternation, stress, wailing and gnashing of teeth, her and the supervisor somehow determined that I was right and that no PCR test was needed so we would be allowed to board. I was confident that I was right and I damned sure didn’t want to end up as a viral internet star for all the wrong reasons so I kept my cool throughout, did not raise my voice and just let them figure it out. She apologized and said “Just wanted to be sure!” which pretty much sums up air travel these days. Anyway, the rest went ok except the security line which was complete insanity.
After a nightmare check-in, we are finally on the plane. Next stop: Bahrain.
We had a very short layover in Bahrain and I was worried that either we or our bags would not make the connecting flight if our flight was delayed even a little. Sure enough, take off was delayed an entire hour for some reason, even though the plane was fully boarded on time. After 30 minutes, an Indian guy a few rows back from us stood up and started yelling at the top of his lungs, demanding to know why the plane was not taking off because he was going to miss his connecting flight. The flight attendants eventually got him to sit down and relax but it would not be his last transgression; as soon as the plane touched down in Bahrain, he and one or two other guys he was traveling with unbuckled their seatbelts, stood up and opened the overhead compartments to get their bags. Seeing what was happening, they made an announcement to stay in your seat with your seatbelt fastened until the plane has stopped moving but it fell on deaf ears so eventually one of the male flight attendants came charging angrily down the aisle yelling at them to get back in their seats. The Indian guy was not in the mood to hear it and started arguing back and it got pretty heated for a minute. At one point the Indian guy put his finger in the flight attendant’s face and yelled “IF I MISS MY FLIGHT, I AM GOING TO BLAME YOU!” and threw in a few more choice words. Just when we thought the guy would get arrested, he sat down and accepted that there was nothing he could do. We de-planed in Bahrain with a very short window but we made it on time. Regarding our luggage, someone had told me about Apple “Air Tags” the day before we flew and we were able to find some downtown. They are the coolest things; little metal discs about the size a thick quarter, you synch them to your phone, put them in your bag and you can now track your bag anywhere in the world. As I mentioned, people were saying that the airlines weren’t even scanning their bags and someone even posted a picture of thousands of unclaimed bags at the Frankfurt Airport so we bought the Air Tags to be safe. I’m happy to report that our bags made it to the Philippines with us.
Not surprisingly, there were more surprises in store for us; After you exit the plane, you walk down a long hallway en route to immigration and baggage claim which normally take forever at the Manila Airport but now there's the extra step before you get to immigration where you have to show your "One Health" pass that I mentioned earlier so they could scan it. I had them all saved on my phone so no problem, right? Well...problem. She scanned mine first and then asked for my boarding pass because she said she needed to stamp it. As it happens, during the flight, Luca asked me if he needed to keep his little boarding pass ticket and I told him he didn't need it because he was already on the plane so he and Xavier had left theirs on the plane. The lady told us she had to have them to stamp and that we would not be permitted to enter without them which seemed completely ridiculous to me. How many people actually save their boarding passes after they've already flown?! We could not have been the only people to make that mistake so I said there must be something else she can do or stamp or whatever but she was insistent and was not being any help at all. Virginia asked if they could get back on the plane to get them and she said we were welcome to try so her, Xavier and Luca rushed all the way back to the plane while Max and I sat and waited, wondering what would happen next. Thankfully they returned with the boarding passes and we got through without further issues. You would think that the One Health website would say SOMETHING about keeping your boarding passes as they needed to be stamped or that perhaps they would make an announcement during the flight to that extent? One thing is for damned sure, I'm never throwing away any of my boarding passes from now on. "It's more fun in the Philippines!"...
We’d hired a van to pick us up at the airport and drive us directly to the beach house but even that did not go smoothly. First the driver went to the wrong terminal which left us standing in the extreme heat and humidity waiting for almost an hour. Then there was an accident and construction on the North Luzon Expressway which turned the usual 4 hour drive into 6+ hours. Now, for those who don’t know, I had suffered from a horrible upper respiratory virus recently which made me cough so much and so violently that I developed an intercostal muscle strain which is where the muscles between your ribs get strained. It’s very painful and it gets aggravated by sitting down for long periods of time so let me tell you, a 6 hour plane ride followed by a 9 and a half hour plane ride followed by a 6 hour car ride…I was in PAIN. But at least we got to stop at Jollibee on the way and I was able to try their new chicken sandwich – which, if it had pickles, would have put the Popeye’s chicken sandwich to shame. We landed in Manila at 1130 in the morning but we ended up not getting to the beach house until almost 8pm. I had asked Virginia to make sure that Lola (Virginia’s mother, for the uninitiated, Lola means ‘grandmother’) had cold beer in the fridge for me when we got there so imagine my consternation upon arrival to discover that there was no cold beer in the fridge. It was a perfect ending to an imperfect day.
Let the vacation begin!
To go to part 2, Click Here
(If you'd like to read the entire blog from my first trip back in 2010, Click Here for Day 1)
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